I was a 20-year old, newly married man. One evening I got a call from a musician friend. Both he and his wife were musicians and church friends. I was excited that he was calling me, and even more that he invited Carol and I to dinner at their house. Wow! It was our first official invitation to dinner as a couple! I remember driving to their house, looking forward to making “couple friends”, eating together and maybe playing some music together that night. We were welcomed with hugs and smiles. We sat down and ate a great dinner and were just beaming with anticipation. After dinner, my friend turned to me and smiled.
“We have something important to tell you”, he said. Wow, I thought!
“Would you like to be able to take yearly vacations? Would you like to buy Carol nice things, and have extra money for savings and kids later?”, they asked. I was lost. Carol was a customer service trainer at a local airline, and I had just begun my career as a software engineer. We were just beginning, but it seemed like we had what we needed.
“I guess”, I answered, uncertain where this was going, genuinely lost at the turn of conversation.
He smiled, “We’d like to introduce you to Amway.”
If I’ve ever an awkward and empty moment, it was at then. In an instant, the entire experience, invitation and hope of friendship faded. I had become an opportunity for someone to build their downline. Ugg.
I hate sales. I am the ultimate anti-sales person. I hate anything that smells like sales. Not sure if I am being clear here. Sales = yuck! And I suspect that as you read my brief story above, many of you could relate similar experiences from your own life. In the context of the modern economy, sales seems like an all pervasive “necessary evil” of our world. It is from that perspective that I hesitantly began reading Daniel Pink’s “To Sell Is Human”.
The truth is, the only reason I even dared to consider reading this book was that several customer reviews of it lauded it as a “non-sales” understanding of the art of persuasion. Sales without decept. It seemed too good to be true. So, the eternal optimist that I am, I peeked inside and found this book to be a delightful example of what Pink preaches- learning to move people. There was indeed a way to commend people to a certain direction without leaving your conscience at the door.
At the core of Pink’s thesis is that you must always approach convincing people with deeper notions than simply selling wares and collecting commissions. In fact, understanding the motivation of “sales” is more crucial than the execution. Pink states it this way:
To sell well is to convince someone else to part with resources— not to deprive that person, but to leave him better off in the end. 1
From that foundation, the author treks through a number of other pinnacles of his new “sales” paradigm that re-envision persuasion by trying to help others. This means approaching your “job” (even if it is called “sales”) by inquiry and investigation rather than determination and demand. For example, an important step is asking people what their goals are not to try to do an “end-round” and force the issue back to a sale, but to find out how to help meet their needs, even if the “product” you are selling doesn’t happen to fit this time around. Even the “salesman” motivational techniques change from deterministic self-hype to interrogative self-talk: asking questions about yourself as preparation for a customer meeting.
Finally, even the “after the sale” approach is completely different. Pink says it well:
Anytime you’re tempted to upsell someone else, stop what you’re doing and upserve instead. Don’t try to increase what they can do for you. Elevate what you can do for them.2
The whole personality and attitude approach in sales reverses course from being the pushy schmuck in a plaid coat to an approachable acquaintance who is there to help. The book highlights, of all things, humility!
And it demonstrates that as with servant leadership, the wisest and most ethical way to move others is to proceed with humility and gratitude.3
Throughout the book Daniel Pink shows a new set of ABC’s for selling. In the old world of sales it meant “Always be closing”. In today’s landscape of information ubiquity, the ABC’s of sales means “Attunement, Buoyancy, Clarity”. In these, Pink re-examines why the internet has changed the world of consumer purchasing into a place where the seller no longer holds an information advantage over the purchaser. The entire book is devided in three main parts: the first is a 3 chapter section exploring the redefinition of many terms that once ruled sales and the people involved. The second section is based in inquiry- investigating and understanding the needs of the customers (where we discover the new ABC's). The final section explores actions- that we engage in to help our customers (pitch, improvise and serve). The sections are clear and points strong. There is little fluff in this 260 paged book, and it goes by fast.
Another very powerful insight that Daniel Pink makes is the research about what kinds of people are truly successful sales-people. And it is not the pushy extroverts that has been the conventional wisdom! Without making up some incoherent or recursive logic about why some personalities sell better than others, Pink brilliantly explores the truth about why we trust some people and buy from them. The new world of “ambiverts”. As someone who is not an “extrovert”, this was a gem in the book for me!
If I had to summarize the book’s approach in one word, the new world of sales is about: serving.
The book is much more scholarly than other sales motivational books I’ve seen, and contains a well-thought set of studies to help explore the main points Pink makes. He has done his research and it is convincing and insightful. I was more than impressed by this brilliantly sculpted, inspirational and (yes) humble approach to sales.
If you are not a hyper-psyched, extroverted, type-A personality, but know that you are needing to be better at “sales” (or moving people to make decisions), this book is for you! It was for me, and I can’t recommend it highly enough. Really! Check it out!.
Amazon Book Link: http://amzn.to/14RcjAi
Review by Kim Gentes
1. Pink, Daniel H. (2012-12-31). To Sell Is Human: The Surprising Truth About Moving Others (p. 39). Riverhead Hardcover. Kindle Edition.
2. Ibid., Page 226
3. Ibid., Page 228
Christ, 
